You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
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You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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