Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Randomize