she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
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