you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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