I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
