My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize