Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
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