I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
Randomize