My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
You made out with two different species that night
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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