You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
These 15 Honest Illustrations Show What Women Do When No One Is Watching
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.