Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.