i may or may not be watching the land before time
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize