I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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