Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
