Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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