I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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