I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
All of them.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
21 Times Karma Showed These People Not to Mess Around
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD