ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
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