Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
Randomize