I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
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