yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
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I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
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Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
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