I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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