last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
29 Unspoken Rules Of “Bro Code”
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
23 “Girl Codes” Guys Probably Don’t Know About
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles