She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.