his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
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