She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
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