my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize