Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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