Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
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