I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize
