One girl and one boy is just not enough.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
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