We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Idk if I want to put a bra on
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Randomize
