Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Randomize
