I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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