All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved