I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Be still, my beating vagina.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
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You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?