this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
