Are we in a gay sports bar?
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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