Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boob is missing a layer of skin
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
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