I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
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