Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
you made out with another girl for some wings
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize
