I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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