he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Randomize
