It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I need water and some morals
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
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