Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
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