I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
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