you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
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I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.