i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
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Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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