my soul wont recognize me after tonight
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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