Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
Randomize
