i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
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