If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
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